Sunday, March 04, 2007

A Post Written Two Weeks Ago....

**Note: I know that this is now horribly outdated but I'm trying to get back into the swing of blogging and I thought I would start by simply adding something I wrote and then forgot. Yes, it is now closer to St. Patrick's Day than Valentine's Day but bear with me- Kace**

How to Please Women by Coy Buckley

Taken from Chapter Two, ‘Valentine’s Day’

1. Play down the importance of the holiday in conversation. I.E. ‘We’re not going to celebrate that Hallmark-sponsored day this year, are we? I’m glad you’ll be in the States so we can skip the hoop-la.’
2. Shoot for the bullseye, impress as many people as humanly possible…send flowers to her mom at her school. Everyone will be dazzled by your sweet thoughtfulness. You will be crowned the Best Son-in-Law Ever. Teachers are particularly drawn to this sort of excitement and will remind your mother-in-law of how lucky she is for years to come. This plan also covers your bases with your wife. She will be so amazed that you can honestly skip Step 3 if you would like.
3. Send flowers to your wife. If you are lucky, she will not be returning home for many hours and will pass the time thinking about what a genius you are to send flowers to her mother. When she finally sees her own flowers, she will be at a complete loss for words.

Note: the ‘flowers to the girl’s momma’ plan only works if you are already married. If you are still dating, this plan will come off as creepy. If you have waited too long to propose, refer to Chapter One, ‘Getting Engaged in a Way that will Woo Everyone Back to Your Side and Put You into the Romantic Hall of Fame. ’


Anonymous said...

Coy- have you heard the good news:
It's true- CUMC reunion. Surely you would come to America for that?

JTB said...

i've contemplated a response to this post for several days now. the thing is that i can't help but think that coy was the actual author. which would go without saying. regardless, must we all return to this site in the future with an expectation that there will be a 3rd chapter to this futile book? i guess so.